I totally underestimated the force of transition, change, and new starts; and that’s what’s been happening around here. My heart and my soul is waiting to exhale! And I definitely didn’t anticipate how hard it would be to move and change our lifestyle. We have poured so much of ourselves into our children and the nest that is our home in the last twenty years.
I’ve moved a lots of times, as a child and as an adult, yet this time was very different. We are rebuilding our lives back into a couple, which is very different from working as a family unit.
We are now, parents to, two adult children, who have grieved the loss of parents, navigating the ups and downs of our business lives and steadily growing into our spiritual life.
All of this creates depth to our souls, that wasn’t there before. I just didn’t realize, nor was I prepared for the flood of emotions, that came with all these changes. I thought because I have dealt with losses, changes and moving before, it would be fine and adjustment would be quick.
Well, it’s been a rough few months! And it is only now, that I am starting to see the softness of light.
I have come back to the idea of impermanence as a source of comfort: that nothing, nothing ever stays the same. While there may have been a time in my life with the idea of change made me uncomfortable, it’s become the thing, of late, that helps me to breathe. When I’m stuck in a cycle of feeling upset about something, I remind myself, “This is not forever.” No feeling or situation, no matter how awful, lasts forever.
When I reflect on impermanence, it also helps me to remember to stay engaged. It’s so easy for me to get caught up the in struggle, which leads to distraction, which sometimes leads to missing out on the good and beautiful stuff in my life. It’s not always easy, but this idea of remembering that every moment is special, because it will never happen again, helps me to enjoy the here and now more.
Yes, it really is okay, that after six months, my husband and I still feel unfamiliar and strange in our new place. We continue to stay in the present moment, as we both work at creating the space we need to release the stress, and be gentle with each other and our expectations.
I’m digging deep for courage, and self compassion during all of these transitions, because as always “this too soon shall pass” and my family and I will be the better for it.
The one constant is I am still curious and open to listening to others; so on that note; how do you handle life’s transitions?
Linda Hensley said
Sometimes I think we're like super balls that bounce really high when we start out, and the bounces get less and less as we age until the ball stops. Picking up and moving takes a lot of energy, and letting kids go live their lives is a sacrifice. Be easy on yourself if it takes a little longer to adjust than it used to. I always love the vibrancy of your work. I'll be happy to see what you do in your new space 🙂
Indigene Art Forms said
Thanks for stopping by Linda. I'm coming to realize that I have so much patience for others, except myself. That has been a remarkable lesson! Thanks also for your encouragement. 🙂
Pauline said
Nice to hear from you, Indigene, and read about your present transition. You have come to wisdom in your time of upheavel .. you are right, nothing stays the same. Your self introspection is giving you treasures. Your move is giving you inner movement, and I think, eventually a feeling of calm, knowing the all-rightness of your new place will be yours. Sending love, my dear, and wishing you joyous fulfillment of your dreams. Love, Pauline
Indigene Art Forms said
Pauline, love, thanks for stopping by! I believe your right, I've learned, everything's a journey. Sending love, right back to you! 🙂